FAQ – Cuckold and Hotwifing

FAQ – Cuckold and Hotwifing

Cuckolding is a fetish in which a woman has sex with men other than her partner, with his full support and encouragement. There are a number of variations of this, for example the husband may sit back and watch his wife have sex with another man, he may join in on the action himself, or his wife may go play alone and come home with pictures, videos, and hot stories for her husband.
There are a few potential explanations for the appeal of this fetish, but the leading idea is called the Sperm Competition Theory. It boils down to a man producing more sperm and having a more intense orgasm when he sees his partner with, or knows his partner has recently been with another man, as he has a biological need to be the successful mate.
A survey was conducted of a few thousand adults and found that “58% of men and about a third of women had fantasized about cuckolding” (David Lehmiller: Tell Me What You Want). While these numbers do seem higher than expected, it is clear that the popularity of this fetish has been on the rise lately. It has become one of the more common types of porn searched for, and there has been an increase in online communities related to the lifestyle. So in short, more common than you think.
This can be a tough fetish to talk about with your significant other because it does involve bringing another person into your bed. However, if your partner is receptive to the idea, these conversations can change your life! There is no specific, correct way to broach this subject, every couple is different and no one knows better than you how to best communicate with your spouse. If you don’t know how best to communicate with your spouse, then spend some time working on this first, it will make a big difference if you already have strong, open communication.
Again this is not a black and white playbook, just some ideas of how you can approach this coming from a couple who has been there, and spoken to other couples, both adding their thoughts. This can take place during one conversation, but often is over the course of many, naturally progressing a bit further and further. Either way, start gently, it helps if you two are already in a frisky mood, maybe a glass of wine to relax a bit.

A few ideas, in no particular order, to tease this conversation out:
- Give your partner the opportunity to talk openly about any fetish or idea they have that they may not have felt comfortable bringing up on their own. Giving them a supportive and encouraging opening to discuss may bring about some very interesting conversations! Also it will quite likely lead them to give you the same chance to discuss yours.
- Use toys in the bedroom, if your wife already likes anal, tell her how hot it would be to double penetrate her using a dildo and yourself. You can use this to talk dirty about her taking two cocks at once.
- If you enjoy watching porn together, start “stumbling across” more videos with threesomes, to further prompt talks of bringing someone else in.
- During a session of heated conversation suggest that it would be hot to have someone else there watching you two having sex. Again, this gets someone else present, and then you can ease the dirty talk towards getting the spectator more involved.

When you get to the point of actually discussing it, emphasize that your partner is your fantasy, that it’s all about them and how sexy you find them. Also be sure to clearly give them an out, explain that if it is something they are not interested in you will completely drop it. You don’t want them to feel pressured directly, or by way of feeling like you’re set on acting out this fantasy and not wanting to let you down. They’ll likely need some time to process, but with any luck you’ll be laying your ground rules and browsing for bulls!
As with how to tell your partner, ground rules will be different for everyone, but there are some key items that all couples need to discuss before they even start looking for a potential bull.

Once you determine the nature of the fantasy, just watching, joining in, etc. You can then talk about things like:
- Who will the bull be?
o Do you want it to be someone you know and are already comfortable with, or completely separated from your normal life and find someone random online?
- How will contact and arrangement be handled? On-going contact?
o Some couples prefer to handle all communications mutually, while others like the idea of either the husband or wife setting the whole encounter up on their own while the other is left in the dark.
o Will you keep in touch with the bull, or is it a one-off? And if so, who’s in contact?
- What are you both comfortable with doing?
o Will kissing be allowed? (This is an important one to sort out as it packs a lot of potential for emotional jealousy)
o Anal? Where can he cum? Double penetration with hubby? Bringing in a third down the track? The list goes on. What worked great for us personally is we browsed hotwife and cuckold Tumblrs and set limits as we scrolled through. It was quite fun, and we were able to have a thorough discussion about each other’s limits.

These are just a few of the big ones to get you started, but as you delve deeper into the lifestyle you’ll be able to make a set of rules that suits you. Some couples will have a lot, and some will have very few, as long as you have a set that works for you and your spouse then that’s all that matters.
The big thing that this comes back to again is communication. Make sure to keep open communication and check in with each other quite often to start. Just out of the blue ask how they’re doing with everything, any thoughts about anything, etc. You’ll be talking about some things that you or your spouse would never have thought they’d say out loud to anyone, or had never even thought they’d consider doing. So you need it open and comfortable enough that your wife can look you in the eye and say she that she wants a cock in her pussy, ass, and mouth all at the same time, and none of them are yours.
The most common starting point is role playing with toys. Bring this fantasy into your bedroom together and get some toys to be your extra person. Start browsing sites where couples and bulls can meet each other. Just browsing together will be exhilarating by itself, and then you can start chatting with people.
Finally, once everyone is comfortable AND YOUR SET OF RULES IS COMPLETE, arrange the first meeting!
Use protection. That’s the long and short of it. When you start bringing more and more people into your bedroom you just have to play safe. That being said, bareback and creampies are very hot parts of the cuckolding experience. So choose a bull, or a few, that you play with more regularly and have them get tested. It is a small inconvenience that leads to amazing experiences for all involved. Everyone else, use protection with.